11 Things to REALLY Never, Ever Say on Facebook

Facebook is great for sharing embarrassing pictures of friends, jokes that aren’t all that funny, memes that quickly run their course, and links to stupid articles like this one. But there are many types of status updates and links that you should never, ever post. I’ll go through some of them here (and maybe you can think of others):

The Death Threat

The worst thing to find in your news feed on a Monday (besides all those OMG It’s Monday again! posts) is a note from a friend promising to kill you. It’s kind of a reverse happy-birthday post, where instead of somebody copying and pasting a false platitude to recognize your special day, they threaten to ensure you never see another one.

11-things-to-never-post-facebook-death-threatWhether or not you want to warn someone about their impending death at your hands, or fill them in on the gory details, there really are better ways to get someone’s attention. You could use the “Poke” feature, for instance; Facebook created it to avoid people like you constantly posting angry screeds declaring your vicious hatred and your plans to act on it. Plus, it can keep you out of jail.

Instead of sending death threats, find a nice kitten photo to share. It might help you calm down a bit.

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Facebook Wants You To Try Google+

Facebook Wants You To Try Google+Is there any other explanation?

Just in the past month or so, Facebook rolled out new features such as Subscriptions, granular sharing, and the mini feed on the right. They have also eliminated items like the Top News/Recent News selector and Add Link (you could just include it in your status update for awhile now). None of these changes are very intrusive, but they range from annoying to inconsequential.

This morning, many sat down to see their Facebook page changed pretty drastically. The News Feed Top/Recent selector (which was obnoxious when it was first introduced) is gone. In its place is their Top Stories feature. Now Facebook will simply deliver the feed depending on how often you visit or log in. (And everybody logs out when they leave Facebook, right? Right? Otherwise you get status-jacked by your so-called ‘friends’.)

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Nike Running: A Social Media Mistake

Nike's Social Media BlunderOr should I say total marketing blunder? First of all, everyone knows in business that you keep your public discussion about your industry and competition positive. The public, even your fans, are turned off by your negativity about other companies.

Nike’s #EPICFAIL

Nike Facebook Mistake Fail

Nike really screwed the pooch on this one. Their Facebook post seemed innocuous enough: “FACT: Friends don’t let friends wear shoes with five toes” it read. No big deal, right? They’re just having a little fun with a trend that has captivated the running world, right? Those five-toe running shoes are kinda goofy, right? Haha, everyone?

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